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Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Update

The past week has seen a flurry of both snow and me attending lots of extra pilates sessions. In the end though I was told not to do anymore since it was felt by M that my body needed some rest and processing time. However doing five sessions in the week has meant that my abs feel like concrete and that new neuro-muscular patterns that I was finding difficult (e.g. spinal proprioception work) now feel much more reinforced. In standing I look much better - I now need to practice sitting on balls/rollers so I can get a sense of sitting on my sitz bones and not on my sacrum, which is where I like to be at the moment. I am continuing also to work at yielding my thoracic spine and buttoning down my ribs. There is always so much more to do!

I haven't had any physio, but seem to be managing so far (touch-wood). My cervical/thoracic junction feels tight, but I am using the pilates ball and doing Bowen to help wtih that. My right hip is a lot better (again, touch-wood!).

In ballet last Tuesday - T and I had another chat at the end of the class because yet again I had some memory problems and was not concentrating on what she was saying, particularly in relation to circular port de bras. T said she thought I might be spending too much time reading about some of the potential for memory problems/concentration and JHS and this was affecting me. This is a possibility, but to be fair I have struggled with sequential memory since very young and anxiety at the moment is making things worse. T said (and I quote) that I am "the best in the class". I should be embarrassed to write this here - and it should make me feel great. It partly does, but I still have a relatively poor opinion of my abilities nevertheless and know I could do better. Over the week I practiced the enchainments and exercises from that class and T kept yesterday and Monday's class format almost the same - the result was that I was apparently much calmer and I felt secure and on top of my game because I knew what I was doing, which all lead to a rise in self-confidence. Last week I asked T if she would give me a private lesson and think she might if she ever has the time!

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