It is New Year's Day and despite the rather grey day felt the need of a walk to process some of the information I had been reading about HMS and triggers of incident - e.g. headache. I got to the park and realised (as K had some weeks ago) that I am now walking more quickly. After a short while I also realised that I was not walking with my head down, watching my feet. I wondered with insight whether I had done this protectively owing to clumsiness in the past and the fear of falling over, or looking very stupid. Furthermore, when I was walking with my head upright and on a horizontal plane, I was walking more quickly, but interestingly hips started to hurt more, posteriorly and probably into gluteous medius on both sides. I understand that this might be because the muscles might be doing something. I think it is both significant and interesting about managing to keep the head upright and this might also link into the fact that I have been doing a lot of work on strengthening both the spinal extensors, and lately the lower trapezious muscles. As those areas have strengthened, they can now keep me upright, and hips are protesting because they have been forced into a slightly different alignment and other inactive or lazier muscles are having to do a little more work. This might also relate to the fact I still have abdominal weakness and therefore I am still inclined to "sit in" at the hips. Lifting out of my hips did help, but I couldn't sustain that for very long at all.
When I got back from my walk I ate something as was suddenly extremely hungry (it was 4pm) and I had had no lunch. I then watched a bit of TV before feeling completely fatigued and needed to go to bed. I allowed myself to do this because it reminded me a bit of how I feel after Feldenkrais and the necessisty to rest once one has explored a new movement pattern. In my case, this was a huge change. I slept for about 30 minutes before getting up to write this. My sacral and area and hips which had been in huge spasm anyway since Tuesday, are now extremely sore, so I have taken some NSAIDS and now have a hotwater bottle on my back and tummy. My neck is back in a collar, but I have done this just as precautionary rest.
There is no doubt that there has been a movement re-patterning and I am sure this is largely owing to improved strength in spinal extensors - quite where this takes us next I don't know, but I will need K to do some work on hips/lumbar spine and sacral when I next see her as the implications of today (and having my sacral area in spasm since Tuesday) have taken their toll. Neck is still troublesome and loathes me lying flat, reading (requiring my head to be down) and watching TV! I had my neck MRI scan yesterday - not sure what it will show, but one thing I still don't understand is why I can still not nod my head properly.
Finally, when I got into bed for my nap, I had a brief 'whole body' spasm attack and lots of twitching. I think this is all further evidence of tapping into a new and unchartered area and taking my body forwards into a new and almost certainly better way of being. It was a revelation walking with my head upright. I can highly recommend it. The view is certainly better. Happy New Year!
No comments:
Post a Comment